Primal vocation (ICA)

This is the experience of having one's name called by history and seeing one's life as having a sense of significant purpose or destiny. It is captured by Hermann Hesse's image of being a marked person and in Dag Hammarskjöld's poetry: "Weep, Weep if you can, But don't complain, the Way has chosen you and you must be thankful". Perhaps General Patton experienced it as he stood on the plains of Carthage preparing to go into battle, sensing that he had been there before.

A dimension of this experience is a sense of awe, that is fear and fascination. One feels compelled to pursue one's quest, be it historical or personal. There is constant fear of losing one's nerve and giving up the task and one sometimes wonders if one is going psychotic. It becomes apparent that one is already a dead person and that ultimately no-one can hurt one. While being completely serious about honouring one's election, one also sees the final absurdity of whatever one does. One learns to trust history as one participates in creating it and feels in league with others who have gone before and trodden a similar path. There is a clear sense of the direction in which life is going and almost a sense of relief that one does not share others' ambivalence.

This state is number 28 in the ICA Other World in the midst of this World.