Passionate disinterest (ICA)

This is the awareness of having totally committed one's life beyond all human relationships and covenants. Relationships in this world become nothing and one will never again answer to any of them. In the midst of passionate responsibility for this world one becomes passionately irresponsible to this world, not accountable to family or job, aware that that is not what life is about.

A dimension of this experience is a sense of awe, that is fear and fascination. The fear is that one will not succeed; a sense of having gone beyond all that bound one to this world leaves the fear that one will forever be bound with just one's self and history. The fascination is of of walking hand in hand with one's own death which one is now free to receive. There is a discovery that one has decided one is risking everything, a decisional objectivity about all that has been binding one to this world. The residue of such a time is a nonchalance that comes from knowing that one is in history for good or bad; it is no longer necessary to win – the act is it.

This state is number 31 in the ICA Other World in the midst of this World.