2. Grief is related to desire. Whether the desire is large or small, if it is not met, you will probably have grief. Most of us have a desire that our systems remain stable and when that desire is thwarted we have a bit of loss and grief. You can think of all of the thwarted desires that arise when someone we love dies. We want that person to be with us still, we desire their presence, companionship, or blessing, we long for the connection we once had, or possibly desire to say one las t thing. We are assaulted and many times overwhelmed by waves of desires that will never be met.